Miracle In Argentina?

06.20.2010 · Posted in Miracles/Hoaxes

bleedingjesus A substance that looks like fresh blood has appeared on the forehead and face of a carving of Christ in a depiction of the Last Supper in the Oratory of the Sacred Heart of Jesus in Yerba Buena, Argentina. The “blood” looks like it originated on the front left side of the head, where it would have been pierced by a crown of thorns, then tricked down the face.

A local priest, Father Jorge Gandur, collected some of the substance and sent it to be tested to see what it is.

Thousands of pilgrims have already come to the see the potential miracle, despite words of caution from the of the Archdiocese  of Tucuman, which has asked people not to jump to the conclusion that this is a holy supernatural event.

Reports of bleeding religious iconography have been discounted due to analysis of the blood, which sometimes turned out to be paint or colored water. None have been recognized by the Catholic Church as authentic or sufficiently unexplainable.

There is something about religious status that might be bleeding that completely freaks me out. Way more than if vampires, werewolves, zombies, etc. were real, even though that would probably be a lot more dangerous. Really, I should probably be more afraid of the people that appear every now and then to tinker with or do some half-assed cleanup on the semi-abandoned house next door to mine. I mean, what exactly is going on in there? Why did they bring a U-Haul over yesterday to just take what looked like a child’s car seat away? Why does the backyard look like it could be part of Tennessee’s Body Farm experiments?

Back to the complete creepiness of the bleeding statues. Why would that happen? If something great were about to happen, why would a sign include blood? If it’s a miracle, then whatever or whoever causing it could surely create something a little more uplifting, like making the statues talk instead and tell us. No, it seems more likely that if a bleeding Jesus or Mary were really to happen, it would only be because either something really awful had happened and we were being informed that we were making God cry, basically, and were likely to get the crap smitten out of us if we didn’t watch it, or that something really awful was about to happen and that we should pretty much hang it up and start praying. Either way, not good. This is why I get nervous when I see reports like this and do a little internal happy dance of relief when they are shown to be hoaxes. Hoaxes might disappoint some people, but at least they aren’t signs of impending apocalypse.

I anxiously await confirmation of well-intentioned but ill-guided hoaxery in this case. Until then I’ll get back to worrying about why there is suddenly a lot of freshly cut firewood stacked at the creepy house.

– Julie

P.S. Did you know there is a drink called the “Bleeding Jesus”? That’s just gross.


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